If only we knew!

The preacher stands at the pulpit and speaks about the samaritan woman.

He talks about how the woman met with the Lord and he pointed out to us - the large congregation - that if she had known she was going to meet the Lord that day, she would most likely have had a different state of mind. Would she have worn a different attire? Would she have gone to the well side at the wee hours of dawn and waited for him? Would she have gone there with the best cup she had on the shelves in her kitchen,if she knew that the Savior was going to ask for a drink of water?

He goes on to draw out a sermon from the tale of the woman at the well. I can still hear his voice as he even cracks a joke about how we make assumptions and the bad sides of having our minds made up,before we get the opportunity to find out the true position of things. He made a quick digression telling about how his wife says that Adventist men are not romantic(i share a similar opinion, though I pray fervently that my husband is different). He claims that this is an assumption wrongly generalized. He was driving home the point that Jesus was open minded enough to accommodate the neglected woman from Samaria who visited the well.

As he continues to open his mouth for the words of God to pour out,my mind catches a flying thought. If I knew that my husband was the man I was going to get married to some years ago, would I have acted differently?

Ours is like a fairy tale, (and I am so so looking forward to the happy ending where we get to live happily ever after) we met as kids. Though my senior,we met again in school where he was in his final year as I was just in my first year. Our paths crossed again in the University- his last year,my freshman year. Then we became phone friends(to think that I used to wonder why the long calls kept coming) and I even refer to him as a family friend(me representing my family and him,his- though my mum knew his grandparents)

There, I guess I have narrated enough about our history,so back to our discussion. If we had known we would eventually get married, would we have related to eachother in different ways?

My husband hangs an accusation over my head...he claims I broke his toy,when we were kids(you think that's funny,no?) Don't tell him I said this, it's between you and I. When he goes on and on about how I spoilt the toy - i think it was a car,or one of those boyish thingies - in my head am like it's either the thing was on its way to being condemned,or the thing was probably fake from the outset cos I wonder how a girl under 5 could have done much damage.

I could go on with the dirty laundry, but I'll let things slide for now. But the main question on my mind is, if we had known we were gonna end up together what would we have done differently?  To a large extent I would say we had a good relationship. Many had thought we were cousins while others called us school father and School daughter(me,i saw him as a brother,so you can imagine my bewilderment when he spoke his love to me). Raking through my mind(though not a detailed search), I can't pinpoint anything I would have done differently, my husband?...amongst other things, I bet he wishes he didn't give me =N=5 for lunch that day in my JSS 1(maybe I would have been fatter if he had given me more sef)

Well, so much for my ramblings. Guess I'm just taking the topic personal. I'll try to apply this to other life aspects....you probably should too.

Painful old age!

She's gone and done it. Yes, she's turned it completely officially to a chick-blog. And not just that, she's done it while managing to compliment her 'man' to boot. Life can be quite un-understandable (won't incomprehensible be a better word?) sometimes. I did promise myself that I'll only spend on paragraph on the topic though - so if you read anything else related to the matter in a later paragraph just imagine that you are reading it here. Comprehende?!

I do think I'm getting senile at the ripe out age of about 3-0 (by the way 0-3 is going to be the scoreline when next my dear Arsenal takes to the pitch - Arsenal of course playing away from home). You see, lately, I've had the privilege of reviewing the direction of my choices and they are - what shall we say - 'unambitious in a innocuous way' (ha! see big english). It's true that I've never had a "the-artist-formerly-known-as-snoop-dogg" album in my collection but most recent additions are beginning to push the limit of gentility - Sarah Groves, Audrey Assad, Corrinne May, etc. There have been some jazz - Madeleine Peyroux, Sophie Milman - and some instrumental - Maya Filipic, Kendra Springer - but even those have definitely been on the mellow side. I think the most noisy songs in my collection are slowly becoming the Take 6 ones (I kid, you know). But seriously apart from that Cake song about "long skirts and short jackets" and maybe a few Sixpence Non the Richer (Stephen Curtis Chapman, Third Day, etc) songs there's not much I can hold my hand up in pride about when it comes to pure unadulterated noise.

Read into that last paragraph what you will. I got tired writing it sef - yes, writing about me is making me tired - GO FIGURE! Nope, it's not that time of the month - Quemi has made it perfectly clear that you can't guess correctly when it comes to that. But I've been up to my normal tricks there sha. It's only now that I think about it I realize I've mentally shelved the last 2 dates in the month when it was that time of the Month for the Mrs. and I blame Quemi for it. Speaking of Quemi, did I mention that she's responsible for the new design of this blog? For years - yes, years - I was prodding happily along with a white background and black text. This year I got very adventurous and changed the font around a little. And boy, did I feel good?! But Quemi had to have her say. Boy, did she have her say. Of course, since we all know that her husband (he of the much acclaimed 'man-of-my-dreams' post) scares me I don't need to go into why this new look will have to stay. At this rate though I'll might have to pack shop and go begging for some other blog to park my rants on. Now that I think about it I realize that I don't haveknow any male friends of mine that blog. Maybe, they all blog anonymously like I try to do here. Even that is likely to change soon - Quemi's expressed her desire to post the url to this blog on her facebook page (Q-U-E-M-I that's how you spell good times?).

For about a week now, I've been reading Stephen King's "The Stand". Now that is a good book but don't go reading it on my account if you are susceptible to night mares o (I no send you message). Seriously, for the past few days I've been sleeping at midnight only because I know that if I stayed up all night I won't be able to finish the book anyway and I had to be up for work at 6.30am. It just occurred to me, though, that I could have called in sick (damn!). Is it just me or were all his earlier books actually quite thick on biblical-ish themes? The last 3 King books I've read (Salem's lot, Desperation and now The Stand), apart from been "spooky" at times, have all had strong "bible-ish" themes (let's just cut to the chase and legalize the conjugation of nouns to adjectives with the use of '-ish' - wait, isn't that already the case?). So the book. It's junk! I'm addicted. I love it. I'm not the smartest one around now, am I?!

It's kinda like how bible study yesterday was meant to be about "Homosexualism". I'm like "please people don't waste my time I'm not coming". I know what I think (don't always do what I think though) the bible says on the subject - which is that it's a sin! So what's the point in reiterating it especially since I suspect the discussion would have no bearing on my salvation - at least not directly. I've been around 30-odd years (yes, I know you are beginning to get fed up with me bragging about my age but that's not going to stop me) and I now consider myself an old timer (I've read enough books to know I'm wrong there). So like all good old timers I'm going to stop wasting my time and yours with this pointless discussion on straight or gay dudes. Now, on the question of gay babes (I can see Meg pointing me to the couch if I continue so at this point I rest my case) - no comments! Seriously, folks how about we stop rationalizing God (big word alert - anthropomorphism). He isn't accountable to any of us and he isn't a MAN. If He says He is not cool with something then obviously it means He is not cool with it - regardless of how strongly we may or may not feel about the said 'something'. Yes, we all have free will. But should God's will also be subject to what my free will decides to be right or wrong? Say it with me people - NO!

Let's see... what else is there to talk about? O yeah, I stumbled upon a atoday.com article about how to keep the sabbath earlier this week. I scrolled down to the comments section where I saw a couple of readers having a good go at each other about the relevance or irrelevance of keeping the day. Now what I don't get (and maybe this is me been senile again) is why someone that obviously doesn't give two hoots about the relevance of the day would waste his time getting himself all worked up by reading the article from top to bottom and then waste more of his (and now my time) pouring out his angst at the evil that he perceived was done to him by his reading the article in the comments section. Freedom is just so abused in this country now it's unbelieveable. Any way, let's let that go now, shall we?!

I wish I could end this blog on a high but I've been almost morbidly moody all week. I blame my guilt at how I've spent my nights not sleeping, and then on the actual physical impact of not sleeping all of  which in turn I blame on Stephen King. Wait, now I sound like that guy I just wrote about in the previous paragraph - talk about beams, specks, and eyes!

Checklist for my 'potential him'

"You this girl sef, you're funny o! though you are not weird and that this idea i had isn't strange". These are the thoughts on my mind as i flip the pages of my notebook where i had done some jotting.

I shake my head as i read thru,and i whisper a quiet prayer of thanks to God.I happened to have dated the write-up,it was in the month of May 2010.I say no more about the reason for my gratitude for now,scroll further down for the concluding part.

Some years ago, i was having a 'clear-your-head-and -get-some-direction-for-your-life' session.My thoughts hovered also on the subject of the man i wished to spend eternity(that's the life after death has done us apart) with. I decided to make the list....notice i said 'the' and not 'a'. I think its a normalcy with both sexes to have a list of character traits looked out for in a potential spouse.A number of ladies across the globe have done this - either on paper or as a part of a conversation-and i did too, though there are a lot of things i don't join the 'ladies-band' wagon in doing. Like the love for color pink or the freakish love for teddies.

Anyways back to my list, here it goes.

--T.D.H (you don't know? - tall, dark and handsome)
--vastly knowledgeable
--have a love for music
--hear unspoken words
--loving & all...
--love God and understand what loving God means
--good sense of humor
--realistic
--command respect
--a good smile
--balanced in fashion things
--healthy habits
--full of ideas and open to more
--wise enough
--admit offenses and apologizes when due
--of medium size (not fat nor lanky)
--disciplined
--goal oriented
--smooth talker
--patient
--nice dancer

There! You've got to admit that this is a Master List. Me sef,i give me a thumbs up,to think that this was written at the wee hours of the day...yeah i wrote the time also,twas 6am. :D

You think am nuts?....it crossed my mind too. But you see here's the catch - and the other part of my prayer of gratitude. Then i had these topsy-turvy relationships, so i prayed for God to step in - i literately tabled this list before him. He answered!

That thing people say about making the list being an unrealistic activity built on fantasies, dint happen in my case. God sent me an answer to my prayer about 2.5months later,in the form of the man who is now my husband. So how does he rate in terms of the list? In the light of not making the head of the man in question swell too much (cos he might just get to read this) I'll keep it simple.

He dances well(he's got moves that can crack your ribs) has got a sweet smile(he's eyes twinkle when he is really smiling) loves God,is loving & all, knows lotsa things(too much sef sometimes - Google & Wikipedia are his accomplices). Obviously T.D.H, makes me laugh and all the rest.Did i mention that he sings,he doesn't just love music. I could go on...but what would it profit me to have his pride inflated - we know that's  a done deal already,cos i have written too much sef(though my delete and backspace keys are still working,I'll test waters)

So did i get a perfect man? No. Why? I am not perfect my self. But did my man meet my expectations? Yes. How come? Cos i voiced my concerns to God.Would i recommend this? Maybe. Why Maybe?  Cos like other areas of our lives, we come up with our expectations.Some times God follows our list,other times he does his own thing.But we've gotta be open-minded enough to trust his will.

Am i happy about God's choice for me?....Heaven yes!!

Absolutely nothing...

"I will never you nor forsake you". Heb 13:5

This is about my 2nd week reading the book of Hebrews. I started chapter 13 this morning and I immediately started enjoying the book. I'm not sure if it the fact that I was reading the last chapter or if I finally received revelation. The latter part of chapter 12 does talk about profanity in the same context as not valueing what is sacred as sacred so no more bible jokes. Sometimes the bible can feel like one massive kill joy - the keyword is "feel". There's a large junk of Romans 6 that talks about dying with Christ (Meg's going to start rolling her eyes now) and been dead to sin. That chapter strips the bible of all it's kill-joyness for me. Suddenly like David God's law becomes perfect. The lightness of the burden that Jesus offers in place of mine becomes a reality and all's well that ends well. Because it is no longer Paul (sorry, but I could not resist) that lives but Christ that lives through me - and nothing is impossible for God.

I think I wrote that last chapter for ME. To remind me of the freedom and power that God has deposited in me through Christ. I went a sizeable part of this week asking God for his peace and telling him that I wanted to feel his presence. Well this morning it strikes me (in proper church speak - the spirit spoke to me) that God has been faithful in all the things I've asked him and part of the work with Christ is trusting him when we cannot see or feel him. Knowing and experiencing God is a beautiful thing.

I want to say something about Meg but nothing comes to mind. F course this can get me in trouble. It's almost like you are so enamoured by something and you want the world to know but you are speechless so you take a pen and write "I love Meg" (google or lifetyme Meg?!) on ur tee shirt and then go stand in the middle of the intersection of 10th street and West Peachtree St in downtown ATL. It's new territory for me (and I've been around for almost 3 decades).

Anyway RvP has gone to the dark side. I don't know where Man.U bought their voodoo dolls but their influence on the-player-who-used-to-be-a-potential-legend is undeniable. Part of me (chalk it down to the old man) almost wishes he hurts himself scoring an own goal (the only goal too) when the Manc come visiting the emirates. There's something obviously wrong with Planet Earth and football is even close to the solution.

I'm not sure how to end today's blog post (blog post actually rhymes with compost)

LDR, multitasking and phantom menaces

This one is going to be a certified rant (right up the same alleys as Quemi's "that time of the month") so fasten your sit belts. But since I know that I don't have the God given ability to get myself out of any trouble this rant will get me in, I'm going to try to be subtle about it.

So I stumbled across this really good christian novel on smashwords.com called "Kicking Eternity". If the book were a movie it would be a certified chick flick; if it was a disease it be would so potent it would make cancer look like a joke; but alas it's only a novel. Anyway, I'll bury head in shame and admit that I not only read it back to back but that I also totally enjoyed it. I grew up expecting religion and knowing God to be as simple as the way the characters in the book related to God - as simple as short direct heart felt prayers, quiet time in God's presense and what not. But I'm African and you know how we do. I don't know if it's poverty that makes us so loquacious or if it's just the fact that I'm part of the meagre 20% or less of introverted Nigerians that makes me think that we either talk too much without hitting the point directly or we hit the point too many times like our Father has too much wax in His ears and our words are meant to chisel away until we puncture His ear drum. No complaints though - I understand that prayer is more for the pray-er than for the prayed-to so maybe the repetition is to work up some faith. Er, but faith comes by hearing... by the word of God, no?

Anyway, so I read the book because I'm in a long distance relationship (insert much cussing and hair pulling) and getting something to do with your better half across the ocean can be challenging - timezone, sleepzones, nepa, internet and all ganging up against us. But nothing, not even suffering from LDR (yes long distance relationships are not normal and if its normal it's a disease-ish) or been madly foolishly in love can blind the eye of a brother to that most excellent torture device called female multitasking. Ladies just know how to do it. Let me rephrase that. Ladies just know how to convince themselves that they are good at it regardless of what the stats say about mankind's lack of ability in that particular sphere. But life is short and love covereth a multitude of sin (especially after they've been aired on this here blog as Quemi will testify) so let's move on, shall we?

But wait I've got nothing else to say now that I've had my fill of subtle rantiness. God knows I want to type some more now but there are just more questions than answers in my head right now like why do girls like romance stories, sef? Seriously I just felt sad and empty when I finished the aforementioned novel - like Drew & Rainey got something that God in his infinite wisdom has decided to hold back from me for another few months. I don't know sha, I just don't know. I think I'll stick with syfy going forward.

I just discovered Corrinne May. I like her. Not the way I like Meg. The way I like Meg is more properly known as love - and imma shout from the mountain tops :). But I digress. Corrinne's right up there in my mind as Sara Grooves, Audrey Assad and JJ Heller. And as a plus she sounds more like Sarah MacLachlan without the sadness-lust (terrible dry humour, I know). So instead of getting sixpence none the richer's new album I got Corrinne's 2012 album. It was either that or Ray LaMontagne's. And that's a no-no seeing as it was my ex that introduced me to him and we (my ex and I - that just sounds wrong) still have a special Ray song.

Just read through what I've typed. It's in my best interest to stop now. God, Meg & I could do with a little less of Meg's laundry on this blog :D. Seriously, though, Meg's the best thing that's ever happened to me. Just thinking of her brings a smile to my face.

There's Poland, then there's Scandinavia

So... 3 months eh... that's how long it has taken me to recover from the beating Quemi's better half gave me for offering her the avenue (this blog) to rant. And what about Quemi? I don't know... who would go near her after that beating I received.

By the way I hope you noticed the choice of words in the paragraph above - first I was given, then I received the said beating. The more sinister among you may infer that I got beat twice. Let's just say I won't refute that conclusion. Whether the reticence I now display when it comes to indulging you thus is a product of my actually been beat up twice or the magnitude of the possible one-time beating is also left to your discretion.

Anyway, I'm still alive sha - and Quemi still has access to this blog. Now whether that is because I'm scared that removing her access to it would result in another round of beating or I'm just been stubborn is up for debate. As I was the one that was beat up and not Quemi I shall now desist from pursuing further the subject of my been beat up. Apart, of course, from mentioning that the husband of the aforementioned Quemi has apologized to me now on more than one occasion - no doubt at Quemi's request. I swear (against years of good Christian upbringing no less) that Quemi's hold over the man no longer surprises me to be honest. What does surprise me though is the amount of pain she appears to not see on my face each time the husband approaches me to offer one of his many 'heart felt' apologies. If I didn't know better I'd conclude that Quemi is using the opportunity to punish both of us: her husband for having the effrontery and indecency to beat me up in public; me for some unknown childhood sin I must have committed against her.

On to weightier matters though, I've now spent 1 year at my current place of work. My boss actually had to remind me as I had completely forgotten. I'd planned to go see a movie to celebrate but I could not get the Mrs. to buy into the idea - she muttered something about forgetting our engagement anniversary and yet remembering my work anniversary. In the words of some old sage - you win some you lose some. Seriously, I like it at my current office and I've had a great one year. I totally grateful to God. I'm even inclined to stand up in church next sabbath to 'testify' of it naija style but let's leave it at that - inclination.

I was talking to my Uncle the other day about Barrack and how I felt history would remember him as been a much better president than the vast majority of Americans now think of him. I think this would be partly because his achievements, or lack there-of, would be looked at against the back drop of the huge 'hatred' and utter lack of 'agreeableness' (I can't believe the spell-checker didn't flag that word) that his political opponents have displayed during the 4 years of his tenure. From an Adventist perspective though, the division of state and religion could not gotten any clearer than during his tenure (it's a joke my people, please take it easy). Part of me wants to see him have a second term just to see how much his style morphs under the lack of pressure of running for second term. But then again my Uncle and I agree that it may also be for the best of the country if a Romney in office heralds a government that is united in solving America's problems rather than bickering about imagined political bends and what not. Then again it could be argued that a Romney victory is a victory for the spread of FUD.

There are two things ways I look at it.

• God truly is an remarkable God. If I had half of his power and fore-sight, He knows I won't have created free will or the ability to abuse it :)
• Someone needs to tell Romney that for every one Poland there are a few Scandinavian countries. In fact for every Poland there's a Greece, Spain, Portugal. While for every Norway there's a ..... Denmark?

Okay I think I confused myself with that last point. Decipher at your peril... or not :)